4 posts tagged “television”
If you've never experience Mad Money, you are missing on one of the greatest television treats in recent years. I only need to point to the disclaimer from the Mad Money Daily Recap:
No further explanation should be needed, but: last night's show was about JIM'S PICKS FOR BEST OF BREED RETAIL STOCKS!!! (I am compelled to type anything he might say in all caps, with italics/bold/underline/exclamation points. It's more realistic that way.) It was a repeat, but while on his discussion of why he though Starbucks was best of breed, he mentioned that Starbucks offers a size smaller than a "tall" - that a "short" does in fact exist.We have done our best to record the calls for you, but remember that the shows are fast moving, and sometimes Cramer bangs on the sell! sell! sell!, bull roar, train wreck, suicide jump, hallelujah chorus, backing up truck, creepy house of pain voice, machine gun, fanfare, toilet flush, all aboard, applause, cash register, bear growl, bowling pins, and submarine diving alarm buttons all at once, while he is screaming.
Some quick Googling now that I'm back home confirmed it, particular this Slate article that not only proves its existence, but explains why it makes a better cappucino.
Thank you, Jim Cramer. Boo-yah.
Quoting Dogbones:
Seriously, I think it is time to start packing my bags. I have tried it here in the US, with all the crappy MTV-era reality shows like America's Got Talent, My Super Sweet 16, and Survivor that have infected our television networks. All these shows ever do is make me angry that the contestants never face any sort of real world retribution for their wildly inappropriate and/or annoying behavior. Japan on the other hand seems to have stuck to the basics. Here is a tongue twister, say it correctly or get hit in the nuts. Like peanut-butter and jelly sandwiches and Snakes On A Plane. You know exactly what you're getting and if you don't like it, then that is your problem.
We need more shows like this, folks.
Were I in charge of TV, I would immediately cancel the following:
- Any reality show about a business, including but not limited to Workout, Blow Out, Inked, Tabloid Wars, and The Restaurant.
- Any reality show that has no basis in reality, including but not limited to Who Wants To Be A Superhero, The Real World, Road Rules, and all spinoffs thereof.
- Any reality show about people living extravagantly, including but not limited to The Real Wives Of Orange County, The Hills, The Victoria Gotti Show, and My Super Sweet 16.
- Any reality show about D-list celebrities that are sequels or spinoffs to previous reality shows. This shall be known as the "No More Brady" rule.
- Any "comedy" on NBC with a laugh track.
- The Simpsons. Let's stop running things into the ground.
- Fox News. The channel, not any particular show on it.
Were I in charge of TV, I would implement a Truth In Channel Name law. MTV would be forced to play at least 50% music videos, as would VH1. Game Show Network would no longer be allowed to run infomercials at late night. Bravo would be unallowed to air anything that would not make me want to stand up and say "Bravo". Were Fox News not being canceled outright, they would have to start actually broadcasting news instead of propaganda.
Were I in charge of TV, grants would be available to prevent critically acclaimed shows from being pulled off the air. We should never have another show like Arrested Development killed for no reason.
Were I in charge of TV, we would import more shows from around the world. Why can I not watch Jeremy Kyle in the US? Why is Spaced only just airing on BBC America now?
Were I in charge of TV, Channel 102 would be an actual channel.
And were I in charge of TV, I doubt anyone would watch it but me.
